You know what you need to do, recognise the importance of the task and still keep putting it off. Even when you imagine the satisfaction of finishing it, getting started seems particularly difficult.
Meanwhile, you hear comments such as “You’re lazy!”, “If you know you need to do it, why don’t you?” or “You lack discipline!”. Sometimes, people speak to themselves this way. These criticisms can increase guilt and frustration, making the task even harder to face.
But what might be behind this delay?
Not every delay is procrastination
Reorganising priorities, resting or waiting for necessary information can be appropriate decisions. Procrastination occurs when we delay a task we intended to do, without a reason that justifies that delay, despite anticipating that it may harm us.
There is a gap between what we want to do and what we manage to put into practice. Reducing this difficulty to “laziness” overlooks processes that are worth understanding.
When putting things off eases discomfort
Imagine you need to prepare a presentation. When you think about getting started, you worry that you will not be good enough. Or you feel frustrated because you do not know how to organise your ideas. You decide to check your phone or do an easier task instead.
For a few minutes, you feel relief: you are less in touch with what was making you tense.
This is one mechanism that can contribute to procrastination: avoiding the discomfort associated with the task. Immediate relief may make you more likely to delay again, even when the later consequences are unpleasant.
A cycle can then develop: the task brings discomfort, delaying it offers temporary relief, and the approaching deadline increases pressure and guilt.
Emotion regulation — how we deal with emotions — helps us understand this process, but does not explain every case. Organisation, planning and the ability to keep a goal in mind may also play a role. These abilities involve processes known as executive functions. Having difficulty starting a task does not, on its own, mean that a disorder is present.
What can help you take the first step
No strategy works for everyone, but some things may be worth trying:
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Make the first step concrete. Instead of “prepare the presentation”, try “open the document and write down three ideas”.
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Start with a short period. Set aside five or ten minutes without demanding that you finish everything. This is an experiment to make starting easier, rather than a rigid rule.
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Decide when and where. For example: “Tomorrow, after breakfast, I’ll work on the presentation for fifteen minutes”.
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Prepare your surroundings. Keep your materials accessible and, if your phone distracts you, try putting it out of reach during that time.
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Replace criticism with curiosity. Ask yourself: “What am I finding difficult about this task?”. Recognising fear of failure, uncertainty or boredom can help you understand what you need.
If delaying tasks is a recurring pattern, causes distress or interferes with work, studies or personal life, psychological support can help you understand that pattern and find strategies suited to your situation.
At Psicologias da Sofia, you can find a space to explore these difficulties without reducing them to a lack of willpower or discipline.
Photo: cottonbro studio / Pexels.
